Mio fratello Richard ci ha lasciati il 9 Marzo. Aveva 40 anni. Era da un paio di anni che la sua salute stava degradando. Purtroppo il suo fegato non funzionava piu’ bene e speravamo tutti in un trapianto. Quando mio mamma mi ha detto che era ricoverato all’ospedale per l’ennesima volta ho deciso che questa volta volevo andare a trovarlo per dargli forza e coraggio.
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My brother Richard passed away on the 9th of March. He was 40 years old. His health was degrading since about 2 years. Unluckily his liver was not working properly and we were hoping in a transplant. When my mum told me he was being admitted at the hospital for the umpteenth time I decided I had to go and visit him to give him some strength and courage.
Sono arrivata nel pomeriggio del 6 e ho parlato tanto con Richard. Gli ho fatto vedere le foto dei miei ultimi dipinti a olio, lo zaino che avevo portato per suo figlio Elia (che mi aveva chiesto in anticipo per il suo compleanno), il mio nuovo passaporto Britannico. Faceva fatica a parlare. …e io cercavo di fargli forza e dirgli che sarebbe andato tutto bene.
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I arrived in the afternoon of the 6th and that day I talked a lot with Richard. I showed him the pictures of my latest oil paintings, the backpack that I brought for his son Elia (who asked me an early birthday present), my new British passport. He was struggling to talk …and I was trying to give him strength and told him that everything would have been alright.
Dalla mattina dopo pero’ Richard non mi ha piu’ parlato. Era entrato in una specie di coma, e non si e’ piu’ svegliato. Quando i dottori ci hanno detto che non c’era piu’ niente da fare e’ stata dura. Per due giorni io e mia mamma non ci siamo piu’ allontanate da lui. Anche gli altri mie due fratelli (Chiara e Andrea) hanno fatto mille viaggi avanti e indietro tra famiglia, lavoro e ospedale. Io gli ho parlato tanto. Gli ho detto che lo stavano aspettando dall’altra parte. C’era una bella festa pronta per lui e doveva sbrigarsi ad andare, se non voleva fare tardi. Sono “contenta” di poter essere stata accanto a lui fino alla fine.
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Since the following morning Richard didn’t talk any more. He was in a kind of a come, and he didn’t wake up anymore. It was tough when doctors told us there was anything more they could do. For two days my mum and I didn’t walk away from him. My other two siblings (Chiara and Andrea) made thousands of trips back and forwards between their families, work and hospital. I talked to him a lot. I told him there were many people waiting for him on the other side. There was a beautiful party prepared for him and that he had to decided and go, if he didn’t want to be late. I am “happy” to have been able to be at his side until the end.
Cercavo di convincerlo ad andarsene, e alla fine e’ partito. E’ partito per il suo nuovo viaggio e avventura. Lui era il piu’ giovane del gruppo, ma ha deciso che doveva andarsene prima di tutti. …voleva sempre essere il primo della fila/gruppo!
Richard era stato adottato. Era nato in Cile, e divenne parte della nostra famiglia quando aveva 6 anni. Eravamo gia’ in tre: io, mia sorella Chiara e mio fratello Andrea. Richard si e’ subito integrato e siamo diventati una bella squadra! Era un bambino molto vivace e curioso di tutto. …un terremoto!! E anche un bel testardo!! 🙂 Era arrivato malato (una malattia del sangue). Dopo alcuni anni, dopo un grande intervento in cui gli fu tolta la milza, era riuscito a guarire ed avere una vita normale, fino a qualche anno fa.
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I was trying to make him decide it was time to go, and in the end he left. He left for his new trip and adventure. He was the youngest of our group, but he decided he wanted to leave for first. …he always wanted to be the first in a queue/group!
Richard was adopted. He was born in Chile and became part of our family when he was 6 years old. There were already three of us: me, my sister Chiara and my brother Andrea. Richard integrated straight away after arriving and we became a really good team! He was a really energetic little boy and curious of everything. …a tornado!! And also really stubborn!! 🙂 He arrived ill (he had a blood illness). After a few years he had a big surgery where his spleen got removed, and after that he was able to heal and have a normal life, until a few years ago.
E’ stato un bel dono per la nostra famiglia. Un regalo grande. Ci ha insegnato tanto. Era un grande artista e aveva un animo molto sensibile. Forse una delle persone piu’ sensibili che io abbia mai conosciuto. Ha avuto anche momenti difficili. E’ stato un grande fratello. Io e lui abbiamo condiviso tante cose. Avevamo molti interessi in comune: l’arte, siamo andati insieme a fare Kung-fu, balli latino-americani, abbiamo fatto vari viaggi, eravamo animatori del centro estivo alla nostra parrocchia, organizzavamo feste di compleanno per i bambini …e molte altre cose.
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He has been a wonderful gift for our family. A big gift. He taught us a lot. He was a great artist and had a really sensible soul. Probably one of the most sensible persons I have ever met. He also had difficult moments. He has been a great brother. I shared many things with him. We had many common interests: art, we attended to Kung-Fu lessons and latin-american dances together, we went for a few trips, we were entertainers at the summer camp for the children of our parish, organised birthday parties for children …and much more.
Negli ultimi giorni della sua vita tantissimi amici si sono affacciati all’ospedale, tanto che le infermiere ormai non facevano piu’ caso all’ora del passo e lasciavano passare tutti. …grazie a tutti voi, amici di Richard. Siete stati di aiuto. Vedere quanto sia stato amato, e quanto ancora gli continuate a voler bene aiuta tanto e fa bene.
Gli amici di Richard hanno organizzato anche una raccolta di soldi che e’ stata devoluta a suo figlio, e organizzato eventi in sua memoria. Continuano a mandarmi messaggi con sorrisi o fotografie di Richard che trovano in casa. Mi hanno mandato messaggi il giorno del suo compleanno. Grazie!
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In the last days of his life lots and lots of his friends came at the hospital to visit him. There were so many that the nurses gave up to make people respecting the visiting times and let everyone come at all times. …thank you so much Richard’s friends. You have been of big help. Seeing how much he has been loved, and how much you still love him really helps and makes me good.
Richard’s friends also organised a money collection and devolved the total amount to his son, and organised various events in his memory. They are still sending me messages with smiles and pictures of Richard that they found in their homes. They send me messages on his birthday day. Thank you!
Richard era una persona speciale. Sapeva sapersi far amare da tutti. E amava tutti, incondizionatamente. …grazie per il tempo che abbiamo passato insieme, e grazie per averci lasciato l’opera piu’ bella che tu abbia mai creato: tuo figlio Elia!
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Richard was a special person. He knew how to make people love him. And he loved everyone, unconditionally. …thanks for the time spent together, and thank you for leaving us the most wonderful of your artpieces: your son Elia!
E non stupitevi se d’ora in poi noterete nuvole dalle forme o colori strani in cielo: quello e’ mio fratello all’opera!
Ciao Rich! Sei stato un grande!
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And don’t be surprised if from now on you will notice some weird shaped cloud of strange colours in the sky: that is my brother at work!
Ciao Rich! You have been great!
Mi dispiace tantissimo. Grazie per aver condiviso con voi questa bellissima storia di fratellanza. Ti abbraccio
Grazie mille. Gli abbracci aiutano sempre.
Grazie Laura, veramente un pensiero toccante. Un abbraccio a tutti voi
Ciao Luca!
Grazie mille!!! Abbraccioni anche a te e alla tua famiglia!
So sorry for your loss. Sending you prayers.
Many thanks Tracey. Really appreciated.
Wow!
What a wonderful way to celebrate an amazing person!
Thank you for sharing this delicate part of your life.
I am sat at home breast feeding 🤱 which is one of the most difficult things I have ever done and I feel uplifted and inspired.
You are also an amazing person just like your brother.
I hope you can meet Emily some day and be a great role model to her.
Love to you and your family xxx
Kathy and Andy xxx
Sent from my iPhone
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Ciao Kathy!!
Thank you very much for your kind words.
I am really looking forward to meeting your beautiful daughter Emily!! …it would be an honour to be a role model to her …and a big responsibility, too!! 😋 Hope I will do everything right!! 😃
A big hug to the three of you!! See you soon! 😘
Grazie per questo bellissimo ricordo! Le nuvole ultimamente son state più belle davvero! ❤️
Ciao Giulia!!
Grazie!!! Davvero, Richard sta lavorando un sacco da lassù! 😀
Laura. Please accept my heartfelt condolences. Your brother sounds like an amazing man and you are blessed to have had him in your life. And he to have you. It is a precious gift for you both to have been with him and be able to ease his journey on. Elia will need you to share your memories of his father and will treasure that you were so close to the father he’ll not remember. Talk to Richard. Your connection to him, though altered, is not broken. Keep your senses open. A color, a fragrance, a tune and he is there. Believe.
Hi Sharon.
Thank you so much for your words. I spent wonderful moments with Richard and all these memories will help a lot in the future, when the sadness will be gone.
I will surely talk to Elia about his father. He is now 10 years old and has his own memories, but I am sure they will get a bit blurred with time. Richard did an amazing job preparing him for the worst.
I will follow your suggestions and keep my senses open. I am sure I will find him somewhere.
Thank you so much, really appreciate your words.
Ciao Laura, non so come mai mi fossi persa questo post, ero in India e me ne dispiaccio. Hai scritto un post stupendo e me lo sono copiato e salvato sul computer: non avevo mai letto una celebrazione alla vita e alle sue meraviglie, a un familiare a cui vogliamo molto bene, in un articolo che ne annuncia la sua dipartita. Dev’essere stata una persona e un fratello speciale.
Ti abbraccio e grazie per aver condiviso con coi queste parole.
Grazie a te Eli! È stato veramente un fratello speciale, e continua a seminare amore attorno a noi, ancora adesso che non c’è più …o forse c’è sempre, ma in forma diversa?!?